A Parade of Child Unemployment

Today on Water Street a parade was being held. I didn't know what it was for, but my imagination decided that it had something to do with a bunch of children being unemployed. Here are some of the things I saw:

I saw this poor, tiny, tiny chef forced to sell his wares on the street.

And there was this thing.

This baby stared down the crowd, as if he could sense each one of our individual faults and it disgusted him. That was a very ominous baby.

Moments after this picture was taken, their eyes locked and the child was devoured in such a flurry of ravenous excitement that nothing was left but scraps of polyester and a single bloodied tennis shoe.

If CHILDREN can't even hold jobs, what hope is there for the rest of us? 

xoxo Hannah

"Happens."

                "Zieh deine Hosen aus!"

"You give me 5 minutes!"

Mariah and I got bored- as we tend to do every single god damn night- so we did what any normal mature collegiate young ladies would do in a similar situation. We stole Tim The German's shirt and took pictures pretending to be him.

According to Mariah, if Tim were a chick he would be a hure..."Making her way across the border to sell her body." - Rizky 

He would also look remarkably similar to me. 

xxoo Hannah

P.S. Check out the ghostly orb on my boot. OooooooooOOOOooooo....

Sometimes I do Things

As I read Mariah's posts, I get the feeling that she's painting a slightly exaggerated portrait of our lives.  She's all like "Woe is me, I have to write Jew papers and read hard books and all Hannah does is take naps, eat, and watch Arrested Development." Well you know what Mariah? I do stuff too. Check it:

I do Suwda's hair and coach her on her singing (not to mention I have to deal with THIS every full moon)

I also do homework. Here is a picture of me doing it. I doubt Mariah has such photographic evidence of her so-called academic toils.

Yesterday I was a Mighty Warrior and I defended my dorm from invaders...Huns Beware!

I'm a good friend too; I'd even venture to say that I'm a better friend than Mariah. I braved rain and chilly weather to support Kai as he got his HUGE tattoo. I even deleted most of the embarrassing pictures I took of him wincing and crying in pain. That is what a good friend I am.

Wanna know what Mariah does all day?

This.

xxoo Hannah