Reader Discretion Advised

I'm bored. Mariah is sitting next to me giggling to herself like a little school girl as she skypes       (word?) with Martin but I have nothing to do until later so now I am BORED and it HURTS. So I will make a list, as I usually do at times like this, and then I will dip pretzels in Nutella and stuff them into my mouth until I find something more productive to do with my time.

Today's List- Foreign Swear Words/Fun Phrases

1. Kanula din rumpa- Only the Swedish can make "fuck your ass" sound so gosh darn adorable.

2. Hibitchku- Cunt in Serbian

3. Suka/Hui- Bitch/ Dick or fuck in Russian

4. Ich wil ficken- I will fuck- German (You can respond to this in a few ways. One would be to yell "Ja! Zieh die Hosen aus!" (Yes! Take off your pants!) and jump the person. Another would be to scream "Ich bin doch noch Jungfrau!" (But I am still a virgin!) and scamper away.

5. Verdammte Scheiffe! Jetzt ist mir der Praser geplatzt.- German- God damn it! My rubber burst.

6. If your life was a novel, then after #4 and 5 the narrator would probably say something like: "Nach der schnellen Nummer in den buschen, konnte man deutlich die Hobbyflecken auf seiner Hose sehen." (After the quicky in the bushes, you could clearly see the semen stains on his pants.)

7. And in one last show of how cute the Swedish are with everything, including pussy biting, "Jag vill bita din fitta."

Enjoy

xxoo Hannah